Family counselling in Surrey, BC · online across BC
When home feels like the hardest place to be.
Counselling for family conflict, in-law and joint-family stress, and the pull between what's expected of you and what you need. In English, Punjabi or Hindi.
- 1Pick a timeBook a free 30-minute call online through Jane.
- 2Talk it throughBy phone or video. Ask anything, with no obligation.
- 3Decide in your own timeNo pressure to book a session afterwards.
Direct billing to Pacific Blue Cross, Canada Life, Green Shield, TELUS Health and most other extended health plans (coverage varies, so check yours) · Registered Clinical Counsellor, RCC #24906 · EMDR trained (EMDRIA) · EFT trained (ICEEFT)
You'll be talking with Sartaj Sandhu, RCC. I offer EMDR and trauma-focused counselling in English, Punjabi and Hindi, in person in Fleetwood, Surrey, and online anywhere in BC. More about me →
When family is complicated
When gratitude quietly becomes pressure.
Parents sacrifice. Grandparents sacrifice. Whole families pour themselves into creating opportunities for the next generation. That love is real, and it deserves to be honoured.
The trouble starts when love slowly turns into obligation, and obligation into identity. You become very good at giving everyone else what they need, and lose the habit of asking what you need. When life changes, through marriage, a new baby, illness or addiction, those old patterns turn into the same painful arguments.
Family counselling helps you hold both: the gratitude and the hurt. Honest conversations can happen with love. That's not a betrayal of family or culture. It's how families grow.
What families bring
Every family has its own version.
- Conflict between parents and adult children
- In-law and joint-family stress after marriage
- Feeling torn between duty to family and your own life
- Different expectations across generations or cultures
- Addiction or substance use in the family
- Separation, co-parenting and blended families
- Old hurts and intergenerational trauma
How it works
The pattern is the problem, not each other.
Everyone gets heard. Sessions are structured so no one is blamed and no one is left out.
Find the cycle. We map what happens in the argument: who pushes, who withdraws, and what each person is actually afraid of.
Practise something new. Ways to talk about hard things, set boundaries with respect, and repair after conflict.
You can come alone, as a couple, or with the family members who are willing. For couples, see couples counselling.
Fees
Family sessions
Extended 80-minute sessions give everyone time to speak and still leave room to repair. Direct billing to most extended health plans that cover a Registered Clinical Counsellor. Sliding scale available.
Common questions
About family counselling
Who can come to family counselling?
Whoever is involved and willing: parents and adult children, siblings, a couple and their in-laws, or just one person. You can also start on your own and invite others later.
What if my family won't come?
You can still work on it. Individual sessions about family patterns often change the dynamic at home, because how you respond changes.
Can sessions be in Punjabi or Hindi?
Yes. Family members can each use the language they're most comfortable with, and we can mix languages in the same session.
Will you take sides?
No. My job is to help everyone feel heard and to help the family understand the pattern it's caught in, not to decide who's right.
Is family counselling right if there's violence at home?
If anyone is being hurt or feels unsafe, joint family sessions are usually not the right first step. Safety and individual support come first. We can talk this through privately on a free consultation. In an emergency, call 911.
Related
Other ways I can help
One conversation can change how the next one goes.
A free 30-minute call for you, or for you and your family.