Couples counselling in Surrey, BC · online across BC
When the same argument keeps coming back.
Emotionally Focused couples therapy helps you see the pattern underneath the conflict, and find your way back to each other.
- 1Pick a timeBook a free 30-minute call online through Jane.
- 2Talk it throughBy phone or video. Ask anything, with no obligation.
- 3Decide in your own timeNo pressure to book a session afterwards.
Direct billing to Pacific Blue Cross, Canada Life, Green Shield, TELUS Health and most other extended health plans (coverage varies, so check yours) · Registered Clinical Counsellor, RCC #24906 · EMDR trained (EMDRIA) · EFT trained (ICEEFT)
You'll be talking with Sartaj Sandhu, RCC. I offer EMDR and trauma-focused counselling in English, Punjabi and Hindi, in person in Fleetwood, Surrey, and online anywhere in BC. More about me →
This isn't about blame
The fight is rarely about what it's about.
Every relationship hits difficult stretches. Many couples get stuck in a cycle: one partner pushes for connection, the other pulls back to keep the peace, and both end up feeling alone.
Couples counselling helps you stop having the same fight, see what's really going on underneath it, and rebuild trust and closeness, in a space where both of you feel heard.
Couples often come for
- Communication breakdown and escalating conflict
- Emotional disconnection or growing distance
- Rebuilding trust after a rupture
- Feeling insecure, or unsure where you stand with each other
- Navigating family and in-law expectations together
- Premarital counselling and relationship preparation
How it works
Couples work moves in three stages.
Calm the cycle
- Name the pattern you both get caught in
- See the pattern as the problem, not each other
- Fewer explosive or silent standoffs
Reach underneath
- Share the fears and needs behind the reactions
- Hear each other in a new way
- Repair old hurts
Build it to last
- Solve practical problems as a team
- Bring new ways of connecting into daily life
- Re-take the relationship index to see the change
Start with the relationship index
See where your relationship stands.
The Couples Satisfaction Index is a 16-question, research-based measure of relationship satisfaction. Each partner can take it separately.
Couples sessions
Direct billing to most extended health plans.
Common questions
About couples counselling
Will you take sides?
No. My job is to help both of you feel heard, and to help you work on the pattern together.
What if my partner won't come?
You can start on your own. Working on how you show up in the relationship often shifts the dynamic, and some partners join later.
Can sessions be in Punjabi or Hindi?
Yes. You can each use whichever language feels most comfortable, including mixing languages in the same session.
Is couples counselling right if there's abuse in the relationship?
If there is violence or you feel unsafe, couples sessions are usually not the right first step. Individual support comes first. We can talk this through privately on a free consultation.
Related
Other ways I can help
Find your way back to each other.
A free 30-minute call for one or both of you.